ramblings...

Today has been one of those days spent on the couch, almost completely wasted as far as productivity goes. Monday is typically laundry day for me and by this time of the day, I usually have a majority of it done. But it is not. I have spent most of my day on the couch - partly because I have been feeling sick to my stomach for the past few weeks and today was a hard day, and partly because of my 6 week old, who is cranky whenever he is awake and likes to be held. a lot. I don't mind holding him, of course, but would like 10 minutes here or there to switch the laundry...wash a few dishes...pee...think two thoughts put together...anything without instant dissatisfaction from him or his older (2 yr old) brother. Even now, my oldest son is demanding my attention - even though he has received much of my attention of late.
I know I "just" had a baby...but I am tired of that reason. I long for organization and normality. I crave it. I need it. I'm going a bit crazy without it. I used to not be so disciplined. I have worked hard the past few years to change that, and it is now that I have seen the fruits of that labor, for the requirement of flexibility and spontaneity have proven difficult. I am encouraged by it, and I am irritated by it.

I am a professional mother. All of this is in the job requirements.

And I love it. :)